Ales… She is her own essence. A virtual person who caught me. I could feel her, read her and visualize her images. I couldn’t help writing. I needed to portray her, to become one with her for a few moments. I strongly believe that life puts people on your way in a very conscious way. People that somehow you have to get some message to or let them get to you… even if it is in the form of photographs. When you decide to change your attitude towards life, when you change something from the depths of your being and you wish with all your strength, you open her eyes and find people who feel, live, and defend the same way of life than you, and if don’t at least they are there bringing you another point of view from this respect. She is a bird, a soul who wants to or is… free.
When I’m with her, she confirm my thoughts; It’s nice to want to be embraced and loved like any woman (I guess the same thing can happen to men), but without owning the other. The pillars of a house are separated but one can not live without the other, or else the house would fall. That means that what someone wants and feels now is not bad, it’s beautiful, because life is short and we take only one game, at least consciously. That our body is a mere vehicle that gives us feelings.
Sometimes you win and sometimes you lose when you decide to be free, and remove the backpack that society slowly and subtly fills with pebbles, until you reach a point where that gesture become automatic, and you spend the rest of your life throwing them by yourself.
My parents were very “advanced in our education” for their time, and thanks (in some things, because in others it was hard) to them my education was “different” than the one my friends had. I was raised to be free, to not rely on anything or anyone else but myself, to DREAM and PURSUE dreams. My parents never told me or made me feel that they wanted me to be something, doctor, lawyer, officer… they didn’t expected anything from me, just my happiness. They always let me dream and wish, and then execute. It was a very hard path until I was 28, because it sounds idyllic, this society educates you to walk with threads that guide you. Having the power to choose is a great responsibility that ended up being too big for me. They did not supported many things in my way of being, for example, that I tell and show everything, my tendency to black and white. My great happiness and my great sadness for insignificant things… but they always respected me. However I was lockuing inside me by my partners, by their modesty that I (my fault) made mine, and tried to be something that I wasn’t. Less caring, less dreamy, less impulsive, more quiet… Today is the day, that all of that is a small memory. Today is the day that I’m a WOMAN, and I am happy about it. And although being a single mother with dreams and autonomous is the hardest thing I’ve dealt with in my life, is my big lesson and I thank life for that.
Not everything is as beautiful as the lines transmit because many people sometimes run in the other direction, especially the opposite sex, when you’re sincere and transparent. But it is worth, because being the same gives peace of mind and a pure love for life, without that I think that you can not love another being.